This past week, I did a page of random creatures. I liked a few of them so much, I decided to not only color them, but also name them & write little descriptions of each one:
The Sea Glorxnard
The Sea Groxnard is a troubled species. It's walrus-like incisors & large proboscis prevent it from consuming any food larger than the gap between them. It's small webbed feet make it difficult to walk on land, but they're also too small to maneuver properly in water. & because of it's disfigured appearance, it's even hard to feel pity for it. Luckily, since it's just as disgusting on the inside as it is on the outside, this makes the Groxnard virtually inedible & too unappealing for larger, more complex life-forms to feed upon. Lucky, whatever it is.
This particualr breed is called a Ruby-Speckled Horshnickle, aptly named for the abundant ruby-like forms sprouting from it's large cranium. Depending on the age, it sports a set of multicolored tail feathers with glowing tips, used to lure prey & impress mates. While it does have a set of wings, the creature cannot fly. But despite being grounded to the forest floor, it's spring-like legs enable it to leap at least 4 times it's height from tree to tree.
The Radioactive Blorbble-Scungk
This one I call the Radioactive Blorbble-Scungk Lizard. It's a subterranean gator-like reptile that feeds on chemical refuge beneath landfills & power plants. While digesting, it emits a series of glowing, fluid-filled bubbles from several waste stalks on the top of his head. Because of the immense amounts of radioactivity coursing through it's bloodstream, it glows several different shades of colors (depending on it's particular mood).
Don't you think some of these would make great toys? Wouldn't the Blorbble-Scungk be cool if he were made like the old Soakie toys from the 60's? Would you buy a Horshnickle fiber-optic novelty lamp? How about a Gloxnard Pez dispenser?
One of these days, when I've got a few bucks to spare, I'd like to have one of these guys made into a figure to sell at conventions or whenever. I really got a kick out of Jeff Pidgeon's Happy Beaver vinyl toy last year, as well as John K's Presidential figures. If they can do it, why can't I?
Oh well, maybe someday.